Needs, Talents, and Desires
Last week we discussed that we search for meaning again and again as we pass through different phases in our lives. At any point we may ask, “What am I called to do in this phase of my life? What is my vocation?” The answer may be different than it was ten years ago.
How do we find our direction?
Matthew Kelly, in his book, The Three Ordinary Voices of God, says there are voices God uses to help us discover what His particular will is for us. Kelly says God speaks to each of us, individually, every day, using many sources, from the books we read, to the people we meet, the dreams we dream, or our own ponderings. But He speaks to us individually through the needs, the talents, and the desires He gives us. We are in danger of mis-living our lives, Kelly says, unless we strive to focus our needs, talents, and desires on doing what God wants us to do to become the best versions of ourselves as well as great gifts to the world. Kelly encourages us to decide in each moment to choose to make it a holy moment, by placing it in the service of God.
God’s voices: We have a variety of needs, from physical, to intellectual, to emotional, and spiritual. We must honor these needs in order to be healthy, strong, growing in knowledge, and growing closer to God and others. We should eat a healthy diet, sleep enough, and exercise regularly, in order to be well enough to help people. Intellectually, we must continue learning. Emotionally, we need to maintain relationships with our family, our friends, and our God. Spiritually, we move closer to Him as we spend time in, as Kelly calls it, “the classroom of silence.” To find meaning in our lives, we need prayer time so that we can learn to discern what God is calling us to do.
Next there are our talents. Kelly believes that “we are capable of doing one thing better than any other person alive at this time in history.” He says we will discover our particular genius through two signs: joy and a feeling of timelessness. When we find our passion, following it brings such joy that time seems to pause as we pursue it.
Kelly says, though, “It isn’t enough to discover our talents. The next step is to discern how God wishes us to express those talents in the world at this moment in history.” He assures us that we have abundant talents, and the perfect mix of talents to fulfill the mission and life God intended for us. Some are for use right now. Some we will “leave dormant for another season.” Some talents are universal; everybody has them, such as the ability to make a difference in other people’s lives. Don’t discount a talent simply because it is universal. Yet some talents are unique and these can bring us great joy and even lead to what the world sees as success. But success is not enough to give us a deep sense of purpose.
Kelly asks, “Why do people who are tremendously successful, who have become mind-blowingly famous and wealthy, people who could do whatever they wanted or nothing at all, why, almost universally, do they try to make a difference in other people’s lives?” He says for Meaning. We can’t live a meaningful life by filling it with things and meaningless activities. People focus on making a difference in others’ lives because their lives feel empty without doing so.
He says, “Our true humanity is realized through acts of kindness, empathy, compassion, generosity and service to others. Only by exploring our profound interconnectedness are we able to fully experience what it means to be human.” He quotes Nigerian author and Nobel laureate, Wole Soyinka, who observed, “You cannot become fully human until you start living for others.”
So, what is the third voice God uses to speak to us? Our desires motivate and inspire us, but the desires that are self-focused and shallow need to be set aside to find our deepest desires. He says, “Each time we choose to live out our deeper desires, we expand our capacity for everything that is good, true, right, just and noble. When we side with our shallow and superficial desires, our capacity for these things contracts. […] The world needs people who want the right things for the right reasons.” He adds that people often ask, “What do you think I should do with my life?” But this isn’t a question for others. Rather it is a question best directed toward God in prayer.
He assures us that when we ask what we should do with our lives, if we listen to God speaking to us through our needs, talents, and desires, then the direction we are seeking will emerge.
(Kelly cautions that as you ask yourself what matters, your future might be less busy than what you are currently doing. You may need to simplify your activities in order to focus on the vital few.)
So, ponder your needs, talents, and deepest desires this week. Take the conversation to God.
Blessings on your week, and thank you for your attention,
Betty Arrigotti
Tags: Self-Improvement, Spirituality
Searching for Meaning, Spirituality | Betty | 
February 27, 2026 9:59 am