Grandparenting as Ministry

What if the most important role of your life is still ahead of you? Have you ever considered grandparenting to be a ministry? We can elevate any activity to holiness if we lift it up to God. This idea can be especially true as we raise our grandparenthood from the realm of familial relationship to a service on God’s behalf.

In this society, many people think of their “golden years” as a time to enjoy themselves. Yet, our grandchildren give a sense of meaning to our later years beyond what golfing or travel can offer. The Bible supports this ministry:

He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which He commanded our ancestors to teach their children so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children.Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget His deeds but would keep His commands. (Psalm 78:5-7 NIV)

Grandparenting can be a vocation, like being single, married, or religious. A vocation is a call from God. Deuteronomy 4:9 says of the tenets of our faith:

Only be careful and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

God wants us to share with our grandchildren what is closest to our hearts. Of course, parents are the primary instillers of faith, but the verse above reminds us we are also called! And this “bonus” parenting in our later years can be a gift! We aren’t burdened by the weight of responsibility that parenting entails. We are freer to relax and enjoy! As Proverbs 7 says, “Grandchildren are the crown of the aged.” And Psalm 145:3-4 declares: Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. One generation commends your works to another; they tell of your mighty acts. We can be that generation that commends God’s works to our grandchildren.

During Catholic weddings, the priest blesses the couple, praying that they may live to see their children’s children. Our goal is to pray for and teach our children, and then their children, so that one day we may be together in heaven. I bet most of us already pray for our children and our grandchildren. I repeatedly ask God to keep them safe. But as I read more about grandparenting as a ministry, I realized I should be praying for more than safety in this life. I should be asking God to guide them, to fill their hearts with a desire to do His will, and to keep them close in relationship with Him. And I should also be praying for wisdom and strength to be the kind of grandparent who will gently help move them closer to Him.

Some parents prefer that the grandparents not share their faith with the children. We must respect their wishes but continue to pray for both the parents and the children that God will draw them close in ways we can’t. And we can live our lives as examples so that we are not a stumbling block to future faith. Though we do not verbally share our faith with the children out of respect for their parents’ wishes, the children are watching our examples. We certainly can and should share our values with them! No parent is going to object to teaching about honesty, integrity, service, etc.

But those of us whose children welcome our faith sharing have many roads open to us!

• Celebrate and hopefully attend the grandchildren’s milestones in faith, such as when they receive sacraments.
• Take them with us when we minister to others, such as in a soup kitchen, or when we drop off groceries at shelters or food closets.
• Read aloud appropriate scripture on Christmas or Easter or give the children their own Bibles or stories of saints.
• Attend church services together and wander through the church afterwards discussing its various areas and altars.
• Tell them stories about your faith life and about their parents as children when they participated in their religious heritage.
• If possible, financially support a week at a religious camp, or a year at Catholic School.
• Or bring all the cousins together at your home for a week of Cousin Camp where you can roast marshmallows, play games, watch movies you choose, or read Bible stories. Memories will last their lifetimes.
• If a week is too long, throw a cousin slumber party for a fun overnight that includes prayers and crafts relating to faith.
• Learn about youth ministry and consider yourself a youth minister to your family. (See The Strategic Grandparent book below.)

All of these ideas involve some planning ahead. To this point perhaps your grandparenting style hasn’t been a conscious decision. Maybe you emulated your grandparents’ approach or wanted to be very different from them. But now, thinking of yourself as a role model in faith or values, it is worth putting some time into planning activities, conversation starters, and purposeful gifts.

Grandparenting as a ministry can grow beyond activities, prayers, and support. It can become a way of life, a reason to improve ourselves so that we lead our grandchildren by example. I want to be the best person God created me to be, so that my grandchildren can look up to me and see someone worth emulating. I bet you do, too.

Personal note: I named this set of emails a few weeks ago, well before I knew that the sweet grandchild born this week would be named Grace! This certainly gives another meaning to Grandparenting with Grace!

Blessings on your week!